that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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