stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize