i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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