I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
