Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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