TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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