My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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