We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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