found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
