dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
i think i just lost a toe
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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