so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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