do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize