Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
