dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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