SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
