Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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