love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
