one might say we're banned from that church
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
