it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
