I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
