Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize