All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
