I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
