Porn is love you can see.
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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