remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
