it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
