Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
