if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize