There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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