some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
