do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
