She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
