I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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