I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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