I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize