More tranny stories later!
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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