new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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