Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
