There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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