Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
