I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
