Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
