Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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