My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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