She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just pee around me
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
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