hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
