and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
