I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
