if you like me you must not know who I am
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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