wat bout pragnant strippers??
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize