Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize