I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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