you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
