went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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